Patience is one of those things I need to work on, perhaps more than anything else. I remember people telling me that once you have children, your patience will be tested like never before. To be honest, I didn’t feel like that when my kids were babies. If they cried, then I couldn’t be impatient with them because they just needed something. If they woke me up ten times a night then I couldn’t blame them at all because they were just tiny babies. I felt tired and weary, that’s for sure, but never impatient.
Now that I have a two and a four year old, however, I’m beginning to understand. My kids are wonderfully intelligent and articulate and I know they always understand when I’m asking them to do something. A simple request like ‘please put your coat on’ can turn into a ten minute battle when we just need to get out of the door. It’s hard. Really hard. It’s hard to keep calm and not get upset with them. Why is it so hard for you to just put your coat on? Why do I need to ask you so many times before you actually do it? It can end up making me feel like I’m just talking to myself and that my children don’t respect me. I sometimes find it hard to still be asking in a kind tone when I’m on ask number six.
In these moments, I have to give myself a good talking to. I have to remind myself how precious these babies are and that they really are just babies, in so many ways. What right do I have to be upset with them over something so trivial?
I find myself justifying how I talk to them by thinking that I do so many things for them, why can’t they just listen? When I ponder on this thought, however, I realise how utterly ridiculous it is. I am their mother. I chose to have them and everything else that goes along with that. I am their everything, I do everything for them. Whatever they need or want, it’s me that they come to. What a privilege that is!
I want so much to be more patient. I want to be more care free and easy going. I want to speak kindly always to my children, without excuses.
I’m so far from being good in this area but at least I’m aware of it and I can work on it every day.
Happy mothers day.